Two Worlds Change. The Empty Nest, and the Young Adult Who’s Just Flown

There’s a hush that falls on some households at this time of year, subtle at first, then unmistakeable. The school shoes are tucked away. The exam results are in. And somewhere in a cupboard, a suitcase is already half-packed. 

Its university offer season. For thousands of families across the UK, it’s a time of celebration, proud parents, elated students, hugs over UCAS emails, and WhatsApp groups pinging with news of acceptance. But underneath the joy, another truth quietly sets in, something is ending. Something personal. Something intimate. 

For the parent, perhaps the one who’s done the school run, the revision snacks, the late-night chats after a fall-out with a friend, the house is about to feel very different. For the young adult, the child who’s grown up in that house, their world is about to expand, sometimes faster than they feel ready for. 

It’s more than packing duvets and buying saucepans. It’s a transition of identity, and it happens, often unspoken, in two places at once. 

What Happens When the Nest Empties 

Psychologists have long recognised Empty Nest Syndrome which is the complex mix of emotions that can emerge when a child leaves home. It’s not a formal clinical diagnosis, but the emotional effects are well-documented: sadness, grief, anxiety, and in some cases, a loss of purpose. 

A study published in The Journal of Family Psychology found that the departure of children from home can lead to lower levels of parental wellbeing, particularly among those whose identity has been closely tied to their parenting role (Gorchoff, John & Helson, 2008). Other research from the British Psychological Society highlights that some parents experience changes to mood and even depressive symptoms during this adjustment phase (BPS, 2021). The house feels quieter, and routines shift. For those who’ve centred daily life around caregiving, the silence can echo. But this isn’t only about loss, but also reinvention. 

What Happens for the One Who’s Left 

While parents are adjusting at home, the young adult is navigating something huge too. Starting university brings exhilaration, but also vulnerability. Even those who are academically prepared often struggle socially or emotionally in the early months. 

According to UCAS and the UK’s Student Academic Experience Survey (Advance HE & HEPI, 2023), more than 1 in 4 students report feeling lonely or homesick during their first term. Another study by YouGov found that 77% of students had felt lonely at some point during their studies, with 33% experiencing it regularly (YouGov, 2019). 

It’s not always easy to talk about. Many students feel pressure to appear independent or upbeat. So instead, they call home “just for a chat”. They message late at night. They share fragments of how they’re feeling, often carefully edited. 

Two worlds once connected by shared walls and routines now begin to shift apart, both still deeply intertwined and both reconfiguring. 

Different, Not Less: Relearning the Relationship 

When holidays come around and the student returns home, it’s rarely exactly the same. There’s growth; new habits, a new voice. The dynamic with the parent rebalances. This can be difficult to navigate but it’s not a loss, more of an evolution. 

Research from the University of Missouri shows that parent-child relationships often become more emotionally equal and mutually respectful after children leave home, particularly when healthy boundaries are maintained (Fingerman et al., 2012). 

The love is still there; it is just expressed differently, and in that difference, something valuable can emerge: a new way of seeing one another. 

Sacana, for Both of You 

At Sacana, we support people during these in-between times. Our service offers structured, non-clinical, one-to-one conversations with trained Matrons in a safe, stigma-free space. to reflect, express, and reconnect with a sense of self. 

For parents, it’s an opportunity to be heard, to say the things they might not want to share with their child. To process a shift that isn’t often named and rarely supported. 

For young adults, it’s a place to talk through uncertainty without needing to protect their parents, without judgement, with someone who just listens. 

Whether you’re the one waving them off from the doorstep, or the one sitting alone in a new halls residence wondering what happens next, Sacana is here to walk beside you. 

The Joy of Finding Your Rhythm Again 

Transitions are rarely neat. They can be messy, emotional, exhilarating and painful all at once, though they also signal life moving forward. You’re allowed to feel the sadness, pride, hope and the hesitation. You’re allowed to miss them, they’re allowed to miss you and together, you’ll find a new rhythm. 

Sacana is here to help you hold that space, for the moments that feel too big, too small, or too hard to explain. 

Because connection doesn’t end when someone leaves home, it evolves. And you don’t have to face that evolution alone. 

References 

Gorchoff, S. M., John, O. P., & Helson, R. (2008). Contextualizing Change in Marital Satisfaction During Middle Age: An 18-Year Longitudinal Study. Journal of Personality and Social Psychology, 95(5), 1041–1055. 

British Psychological Society (2021). Parenting and the Empty Nest. Retrieved from: www.bps.org.uk 

Advance HE & HEPI (2023). Student Academic Experience Survey. Retrieved from: www.hepi.ac.uk 

YouGov (2019). Loneliness at University. Retrieved from: yougov.co.uk 

Fingerman, K. L., Cheng, Y. P., Tighe, L., Birditt, K. S., & Zarit, S. (2012). Relationships Between Young Adults and Their Parents. In Journal of Family Issues, 33(6), 707–736.